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Local Girl Seeks To Destroy

Local girl seeks to destroy you with epic-ness.



G String Mag 2.0

G String Magazine, clinic initially a magazine featuring different types of G guitar strings and their owners, tries for a new edgier direction.

Hermione’s Hiney

“Hermione- hiney”, price added to the 2010 Harry Potter Book of Spells.

Local Girl Walks Own Butt Without Leash

In a local neighborhood, recipe a girl has been seen walking her own butt without leash, local officers have given her several citations.

Jennifer Love Hewitt Not Engaged

Rumors of her engagement to loser Jaime Kennedy have been blown out of proportion. “I am in no rush, viagra and still want to be in gang bangs for some time, and Jaime being the loser that he is, understands”.

Babe Takes “Flash Me” Request Too Literally; Blinds Boyfriend

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In Northern California, sick a college freshman was blinded when he innocently requested that his foreign exchange girlfriend flash him. The babe, more about not familiar with the American tradition of flashing, illuminated her face and neck region to such high levels that doctors have said the young man will be lucky if he ever sees his GF’s bodacious ta-tas again.

Cowgirl and Indian Showdown

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At sundown, page local cowgirl and Indian babe will battle to the barebutt. Winner will receive bragging rights and a coupon to buffet at local Indian Casino.

Pippi Longstocking To Return

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Feature film version of the beloved Pipp Longstocking is currently in talks amongst a few of your aunties who remember that character. “Remember Pippi Longstocking? They should make a movie about her”, view says your eldest cooler auntie.

Poison Use Falls

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This Halloween crazies, see sickos, and pervs alike will reduce their poison use in candy due to the troubling economy. “I just can’t use as much poison as I’d like to, I have to pay off the windowless van eventually ya know?”, says local creep.

Maid Service Adds Service

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Local maid service is adding a new service to their menu. Current services like making the bed, case cleaning, symptoms and dusting are still available. However if you wish for the maid to roll around and make a mess of your bed naked, well that can now be done.

Hiding In Closets

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Hiding in closets was voted as the number one favorite past time activity beating out stealing friends french fries when they leave the room.

Snow Refuses to Melt

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Snow in Milwaukee is refusing to melt, sildenafil despite the 90 degree weather. “This snow won’t melt!”, exclaims local Milwaukee resident.

Home Depot Sale

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Home Depot is having a sale on hotubs, viagra buy blinds, prostate curtains, and teenaged self shooters, this week only, while supplies last.

NEWS UPDATE: Curtains are sold out.

Backpack Sales Decline

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Sales of backpacks have declined in recent years, information pills as kids find them pointless and dorky. Dorks still using trapperkeepers.

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