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“Once you go Black Power Ranger you never go back”, says sexy Blue Power Ranger.

Marine biologists off the coast of the Galapagos Islands, have discovered a mermaid of the strangest kind. This mermaid has the normal upper portion of a human woman body, but oddly, and quite frankly inexplicably, has two human legs where the fish tail portion should be. Remarked one biologist, “the only thing I can say conclusively at this point is that I would for sure hit that.”

“Now the pants”, says a creepy you.

Shockwaves could be felt as far as England, as Guinness Draft Beer documented the world’s largest sexual squirt explosion in weeks.

Local girl gave birth to a healthy 2 pound chihuahua last week. Doctors were baffled to find a dog inside a human girl, “but that’s what you get when you have sex doggystyle”, claims doctor.

Short torso girls now have a chance at getting blogged after they go through excruciating painful process of getting their torso extended. “I only worry that blogs are too short to contain my longness” says long torso babe.

Jennifer Love  Hewitt to star in live action production of Sponge Bob Square Pants, she will portray the character Huge Boob No Shirt.

Katy Perry poses for Esquire magazine also known as the gateway publication to the harder stuff. Fans and creeps alike predict fully nude photos to appear in the next 6 months.

Local statistician has made an alarming discovery, “simply put, puffy nips are on the rise.  Which is directly related to the rise in my pants”, claims local statistician.

Local Anti Fur Activists have officially ended their pursuit in stopping animals from being used as fashion accessories. “We collectively said F-it, these babes just make fur look too sexy” says local former anti fur activist sporting her new fox fur bracelet.

For years local indie babe has had to suffer the cold autumns by only wearing half length panty hose and maybe a scarf. “Which started as necessity has now become my own panty hose line called, Noway Hose”, says a half nude panty hosed babe. The full length hosiery line will debut early 2011.

USA World Cup Babe doesn’t like losing and is very sad reports reporter, but will show tits for the win! FTW!

Sexy Tampa Bay teacher, Stephanie Ragusa is sentenced 10 years in prison for having sex with her two male students, (16 + 14). When asked if the boys had regretted anything during the school year, their reply was, they wished they had failed the class so they would have to take it over…and over…and over again.

Russian national Anna Chapman, a 28-year-old divorcee with a masters in economics, had been passing information to a Russian government official every Wednesday since January. However authorities are gonna let this one slide. “She looked like she learned her lesson”, says official. Authorities will be enforcing a mandatory facebook picture update from her 4 times a week for the next 6 months.

NEWS UPDATE
In Russia, facebook hacks you. Our team of Russian Horny spies hack sexy spies phone and reveal nude photo.