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Hawaii Takes Vacation

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Hawaii will be away on vacation this week, sales please make a note of it.

Snow Refuses to Melt

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Snow in Milwaukee is refusing to melt, sildenafil despite the 90 degree weather. “This snow won’t melt!”, exclaims local Milwaukee resident.

Summer Comes To An End

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This Summer has officially come to an end, case not to be confused with this Summers hit title Summers Cums On An End.

Home Depot Sale

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Home Depot is having a sale on hotubs, viagra buy blinds, prostate curtains, and teenaged self shooters, this week only, while supplies last.

NEWS UPDATE: Curtains are sold out.

Backpack Sales Decline

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Sales of backpacks have declined in recent years, information pills as kids find them pointless and dorky. Dorks still using trapperkeepers.

No More Button Fly

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The Levi’s family is apologetic to the millions of people that have been frustrated with the button fly invention. We have just realized that they are actually pretty annoying, there says James Levi.

wizard of oz celebrates 70th anniversary by going hi-def

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One of the most beloved films of all time, more about The Wizard of Oz, ed celebrated the 30th anniversary of it’s release this month by finally releasing a high definition version of the movie. With each copy of the  HD release, fans were also treated to a commemorative ‘Yellow Brick Moonbounce.’

Polanksi Wants More

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Roman Polanksi says, troche “I am still down for these young babes, like seriously”.

Mirror Travel Still a Possibilty

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Scientist are still hard at work into find a way to travel into a mirror. “The dream to travel into a mirror that is exactly the same but mirror flipped has been a long time dream of ours”, see says mirror scientist.

3 Babes Better Than 1

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Studies show that 3 babes are better than 1, site says local scientist.

Ghostbusters 3

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Mandy Moore, buy Michelle Trachetenberg, and Natalie Imbruglia, will star in the new Ghostbusters 3 film. Director/writer Harold Ramis admits, “it’s just gonna make more money if they star in it, so I said eff it, lets get those babes in there”.

Airlines Using Unusual Tatics

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In an attempt to improve profits, help airports will add a Zero Class section to planes. Paying top dollar to sit next to a topless babe for the entire journey.

NEWS UPDATE: United Airlines buys Brazil.
2nd NEWS UPDATE: United Airlines the 3rd richest country in the world.

Mickey Mouse has Illegitimate Child

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Good old Mickey Mouse is said to be the father of several illegitimate children. The mothers are alleged from the 90’s Mickey Mouse Show.

Bathing in Old Bath Water

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Bathing in old bath water may extend life by 2 days say experts. “That sounds about right”, treatment says expert.

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